Friday, February 8, 2013

Dating Dilemmas: Being Ignored

H a p p y   F r i d a y !

Continuing from last week's Dating Dilemma post...

Being ignored is never easy. What about when someone you meet for a few dates starts to ignore you? That isn't easy either. A good friend of mine had this happen to her. She met someone a few times and really began to become interested in him. He seemed interested in her too. She would read me their conversations and tell me about their dates, and this guy seemed to be really into her.

Time would pass, and there wouldn't be much follow up from him. So, naturally she'd text him, because that is what you do when you're interested in someone, right? He would respond, and they'd hang out. This went on for a bit, but he just never seemed to fully pursue something with her. And, it came to a point where he didn't follow through with things he'd say he would do -- that he would text/call her, make plans to hang out again, etc. He was full of many excuses, and then that was really it.

Obviously as her friend, this frustrated me. How can someone be so cowardly? I still don't understand it. I think the downfall of our generation being so networked by social media, is that we have failed as human beings to be courteous and have integrity. Especially in these sorts of situations. It's much easier to just drop off the face of the earth, and I suppose not feel bad about it. This is something I see a lot in the online dating world. That frustrates me even more! Just because there's no prior friendship before meeting someone online, doesn't mean that you have the right to just ignore someone when you're not interested.

I wish people had more decency than that. I feel it comes down to the fact that people are cowardly but also people are afraid of being honest. Another downfall of our computer/social networking infatuation: we aren't very good at communicating in the real world, with real people.

So, what do you do if you find yourself being a victim of being ignored?

>> When you find yourself being involved in a one-way communication with someone, chances are they are not as interested as you, and they're too afraid to be honest with you. Confront them directly, and be prepared to move on.
>> Don't get too attached. Often times we (esp. girls) can get attached very quickly, even with someone we just met. Be cautious; guard your heart & mind. If someone is beginning to ignore you, it is much better to deal with that when you're not yet attached.
>> Call them out! Don't dance around the topic. Real relationships deal with honesty, conflict & communication, so it's great to practice this from the get go.
>> Don't waste your time. If someone does not have the integrity or the heart to be honest with you, and especially if you don't feel they are making the effort with you, it's time to walk away.

You have to realize that YOU are worth more than falling victim to this. You were made to love and be loved, and if someone doesn't desire to pursue you directly, then you shouldn't wait around for them.

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This is my 3rd post on my new blog feature Dating Dilemmas. I was really excited to test this out when the idea came to me. My goal for this feature was to be able to help anyone who was experiencing a dilemma of their own. How are you liking this feature? Do you find it useful? Do you think I should continue with it? 

I'd love your feedback! Feel free to comment below OR e-mail me at


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